Self-regulation refers to the ability to understand and manage behaviors and responses to stimuli. While self-regulation develops quickly in toddler and preschool ages due to rapid brain growth, it continues to develop into adolescence and adulthood.
To learn self-regulation, children must have predictable, responsive caregivers who model the skill. Over time, they gain proficiency in responding to stressful situations calmly, expressing themselves with words, and navigating conflict without losing control. Some children are naturally easygoing and develop this skill more easily, while others who experience strong emotions may find self-regulation difficult.
Sometimes, children lack appropriate role models or a supportive environment and enter adolescence with little practice in self-regulation. The teenage years bring more complex emotional challenges, which makes the skill an important part in maintaining relationships and developing independence.
Adolescence and young adulthood are developmental stages that involve both risk and opportunity in terms of self-regulation. Interventions that teach specific cognitive, emotional, and behavioral skills can provide a foundation that will help individuals transition into adulthood with healthy behaviors and coping mechanisms.
Just as with a child lagging behind in literacy skills, self-regulation can improve with targeted practice. Teenagers need caregivers and mentors who can provide a positive example of self-regulation. Adults who can manage and modulate their own emotions facilitate the process of co-regulation, which assists and supports young people in developing the skill.
Adults should be warm and responsive to teenagers’ needs, coaching them as they try to understand and express their own feelings. Adult caregivers can offer opportunities for teenagers to practice self-regulation and reinforce progress through repetition.
As teenagers improve at self-regulation, their caregivers can offer increasingly complex opportunities to practice the skill. With a parent, for example, the teenager might role play a conflict with a colleague at work. A parent might also guide a high school student through a stressful homework assignment, teaching them how to break the task down into manageable chunks.
To set adolescents up for success, adult caregivers should structure an environment that protects against potential external stressors. For example, a parent might implement a curfew to help limit opportunities for risk-taking behavior or allow a teenager to retreat to their bedroom for a “timeout” during an emotionally tense exchange. Similarly, parents and caregivers should clearly outline boundaries and expectations and enact natural consequences when teens make bad decisions.
Particularly for teenagers who have had adverse childhood experiences, lagging self-regulation skills may translate to academic challenges, problematic relationships, and risky behavior. Without intervention, this lack of self-regulation may contribute to chronic stress that can physically change the brain’s wiring, relying more on emotional response than rational thought.
The Office of Planning, Research, and Evaluation (OPRE) published a report titled “A Comprehensive Review of Self-Regulation Interventions from Birth through Young Adulthood,” which reviewed 299 interventions across age groups. The report looked at 60 studies on a variety of intervention approaches, including mindfulness, resiliency training, stress management, and conflict resolution.
When researchers implemented these interventions with young adults and high school students, they noticed significant improvements in mental and physical health, delinquency, and cognitive regulation.
Research supports the inclusion of self-regulation training in high school curricula, particularly for at-risk groups. Co-regulation support from a trained “coach” can help young people set clear goals and provide skill support, while targeted courses can teach teens how to accept and manage negative emotions. By learning to modulate their emotions, adolescents can develop competency in solving problems, achieving goals, and making sound decisions.
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